Nayab Midha on Poetry, Love, Marriage, Feminism, Relationships & Social Media | Bani Anand | AAE S4

In this deeply personal and thought‑provoking episode of AfterHours with All About Eve, Bani Anand sits down with poet Nayab Midha for an unfiltered conversation on poetry, privilege, self‑acceptance, and the harsh realities of social media. Nayab opens up about her journey—the highs, the lows, and the privileges that come with success. She beautifully articulates how poetry is about emotion and relatability, not power. As the conversation unfolds, Nayab discusses 'Muskurao', a poem that resonated deeply by challenging society’s perception of failure. She shares how poetry became an act of unlearning, breaking free from academic expectations and embracing storytelling. Growing up in a middle‑class home with high parental expectations, she struggled at school but found solace in books and words. The podcast shifts to self‑love and beauty standards as Nayab recites 'Tum Khubsurat Ho', a poem urging people to embrace their flaws. From being shamed for her curly hair and husky voice to finding confidence in her uniqueness, she credits her mother for teaching her resilience and empathy. But with recognition comes vulnerability. Nayab recalls how her deeply personal poem Papa Perfectionist Hai was reduced to a meme, sparking hate and trolling. The backlash exposed the brutality of social media, particularly for women. Bani and Nayab explore gender roles and societal conditioning. Nayab shares a moment from the pandemic when her brother, frustrated with household chores, used "feminist" as an insult. This led to an emotional conversation about feminism—not as a privilege, but as a fight for fairness. The discussion expands into relationships and the red flags that are often ignored. Nayab examines how generational shifts have shaped women’s roles—grandmothers were confined to their homes, mothers balanced both worlds, and today’s women challenge gendered expectations. She critiques how men are raised to chase success, while women are conditioned to see marriage as their ultimate goal, creating an imbalance in how both perceive freedom—a theme she explores in her show Rajkumari. Nayab reflects on love and emotional security, admitting she once tested her partner’s patience, knowing that once deeply in love, leaving becomes harder. She confesses that she worried whether earning more than her partner would create tension, but the biggest green flag? Nothing makes him insecure. The interview moves to the three things Nayab would never give up in love—her self‑respect, dreams, and rights. She then explains the difference between adjustment and compromise—adjustment is generous, but constant compromise erodes self‑identity. The episode concludes on a playful yet insightful note with "What’s the Catch?", where Nayab deciphers hidden relationship red flags—partners who subtly undermine ambition or remain silent in front of family. She shares how her fiancé, despite not being as ambitious, wholeheartedly supports her dreams without resentment. Packed with wisdom, humour, and raw honesty, this episode challenges traditional gender roles and explores what true partnership really looks like. A must‑watch for anyone navigating modern relationships, redefining love, or seeking clarity on what truly matters in a fulfilling connection. (00:00) Episode begins (01:59) What does it feel like to be so young and self‑made? (02:48) What has helped Nayab connect with people? (04:33) Why did she struggle in school? (07:23) Does she resent the years of her childhood when she couldn’t figure herself out? (09:00) ‘Tum Khoobsurat Ho’ (10:07) The values Nayab holds dearest (13:53) The worst thing she has read about herself on social media (17:53) Do her parents feel she shares too much about their family? (20:55) On patriarchy (23:55) Nayab’s perspective on equality and feminism (25:10) "Feminist kahin ki!" (28:00) What would Nayab say to young girls about making money? (32:04) Are bangles shackles for women? (35:32) We have sold the dream of marriage to women and the dream of success to men. (40:31) How Nayab used to test her partner (46:07) The little things she enjoys doing with her partner (48:48) One‑sided love – Nayab’s thoughts (51:21) Humans enjoy passion as an emotion (54:05) Three things she will never give up for love (55:23) The difference between adjustment and compromise (56:35) How does Nayab unwind AfterHours? (57:52) Game – ‘What’s the Catch?’